I met this energizer, encourager and organizer less than a year ago and she became one of my best friends.
In April of last year I started to look for another place to live in Kansas City and a friend of mine I had lost contact with was looking for a roommate. I reconnected with her and we both thought that her house would fit me well. She said there were three other girls who lived there and explained each of them to me. Through her descriptions I liked all of them. A room wasn’t open until June so mid June I moved into this adorable blue home where three incredible women lived. I knew Erica, but not the other two. I would love to focus on all of them, but my heart has wanted to write about this specific friend for a while.
Christiana. When I met her I thought we would get along, but I didn’t think we would become such besties. My first few weeks in the house were busy with work and being a sloth on the couch because it was so hot outside. Christiana babysat, ran errands and hung out with her boyfriend. There were two moments when I thought “oh okay okay we’re gonna be close.” The first was her birthday. I had lived, let alone known her for shy of 10 days when she invited me to be apart of her birthday evening. Birthdays to me are intimate and her evening was intimate with just a few close friends and yet she included me. Maybe she was being nice to the new girl, but I don’t care. Moving into a house where three girls who were best friends lived was tough, because I was the outsider. However, these ladies made the transition heart-warming. The first day I lived there the four of us went to Target and that weekend we went to the movies. Then Christiana included me in her birthday night. Their hearts were so kind so, really, who WOULDN’T want to be their friend?!
The second moment, which is more vivid for me was when we were driving back from her parents in Lee Summit, the night before she left for Hong Kong for 5 weeks. A few days prior to this she started telling me her life story. Up until this car ride I had listened to possibly 8 hours of her life, and I felt like we were finished. On the car ride home though she opened up to me on a level most of my close friends of years don’t go to. And, not to brag, but people do open to me easily so Christiana’s trust in me meant the world to me.
She left for Hong Kong the next morning. So you get the picture. She had a set life with a job, close friends, awesome boyfriend, and an amazing family. She didn’t have to make an effort to get to know me, nor did I. I don’t remember vivid details, which is rare, but I do know that I’ve always felt blessed to have moved in with her and I’m to this day so thankful I met her. I can’t imagine my life without her as my friend and I get weirded out thinking that she wasn’t in my life simply a year ago.
Christiana is many things. She is self-motivated, productive, funny, beautiful, tender-hearted, tough-skinned, intelligent, loves people, can talk longer than anyone I have ever met, joyful, loyal to all, fun…the list can go on for miles. Her quirks crack me UP. She notices if a plant is moved by an inch, she quotes movies. Not any movies though….movies from 1998 that no one remember. Madeline, Tangled, Parent Trap, Emperor’s New Groove, Lizzie McGuire and Ice Age are just a few of the “go to” movies she’ll quote. When you walk in a room her eyes get big, she’ll tip her head back and say “hiiiii.” If she doesn’t see you for two days she’ll snap chat you with a whining face and caption it saying “miss youuuuu.” She loves trying new things and is always down for an adventure.
To say she makes me laugh is an understatement. Not because she has the best jokes, but just how she is can be hysterical. I think part of this is because we are different so when she does or says things that are so opposite of me I can’t help but laugh. However, and this is a big one, we both are similar in how we like living, which is the biggest blessing EVER. We’re both clean, practical, understanding of space, can say, “I’m going to go be in a room for a while,” share the same morals, are very responsible and remember exactly what we need to do, when we need to do it.
-Doing homework in my room, hearing a knock at my door and ending up talking for hours with her.
-Going shopping with her. She was so blunt with my choices. “No Mary. That isn’t flattering. You seeeee you have a great hip to waist ratio. You have to show that.” She took shirts from me and replaced them with ones of her choice. If you ever see me in a black and white striped shirt, that was her pick.
-Going to dinner with her and Christian. I was working one night when the two of them came to visit me. I hadn’t gotten to know either of them well and it was their date night. Christian invited me to dinner with the two of them and they invested the entire dinner in getting to know me.
-Her movie quoting. It’s out of control.
-If we are out of town together and share a bed. That girl gets so giddy about sleepovers you’d think she was in the 3rd grade. I think she still is. These are favorite memories because we’ll stay up for hours upon hours talking.
-She is predicable, but also very unpredictable. Predicable in where I could guess what her stance would be on a topic, how she has “go to” phrases such as “that was EEEPIC,” “you’re such a noob,” and many others. She is unpredictable in the way she’ll go about something. I never know what “Christiana” I’ll come home to. A joyful one, always, but how she greets me is always different. It’s never just a “oh hey.” She greets me as if she is (she is) SO happy I’m home, which makes me so excited to see her cute purple car in the driveway. If she thinks I’m home she’ll shout from upstairs “Mary!?” and if I see her as I enter the house her eyes will get big and go “Heeeeellllooooo” with a big smile. Sometimes it’s a head nod or a hug. My favorite now is when she is on the search for me she says my name in a tone I can’t even articulate and say “Medwy!” It cracks me up. She is animated, quirky, full of life, and someone everyone loves being around.
-Going out the two of us and talking. I think we could talk forever, and have. If it’s on the phone, on my bed, in the car, sitting at a fancy restaurant booth or waiting for church to start, we chat it UP. We also know how to chill, and memories of sitting around the table doing homework or lounging on our computers in the living room are moments I’ll cherish.
-Meeting up for lattes after my night classes.
-We had a snow day and we went out, got Baileys and Champagne, and spent two days watching movies, getting cabin fever together and yelling at the snow.
-I’ll always remember going to the KC Royals game with her. Not because of the game, but I knew then, more than I already had, that she was a friend I’d go to these events in the years to come once we’re either working, married, both, whatever life brings.
-She is very protective over me and has highest of standards for whoever I end up with. Whenever I’ve talked about showing interest in someone she’ll squint her eyes and slowly say, “interesssssting” or “go ooooon.”
-Having her and Christian visit me and my family over Christmas break this year. It was fun having her get to know my family—I think it gives anyone a better picture of me.
I’m sitting here thinking of fun adventures we’ve done and yes, we’ve done fun things, but my favorite, as said many times already is just talking with her. I think that’s when you know you’ve found a good friend: when you don’t have to go shopping, eat at classy places or invite others for a good time. The two of you can be in any place no matter the atmosphere, and enjoy the other’s company.
Christiana is a woman of conviction, vulnerability, and loyalty. She appreciates people for who they are. Who they are internally and externally. She is quick to compliment me in both those areas. So much so I have to say “a kaaaaay stop. No.” She just laughs and goes “YES MARY YES!”
I graduate in December and the option of moving is real. I’ve loved the last 4 years in Kansas City and I wouldn’t mind having a new chapter start somewhere else. I’m also heartbroken thinking about this possibility. I deeply care about everyone here in KC and the thought of leaving anyone kills me. Christiana is one of the people who I would be so sad to leave. However, if I did, she is a friend who I know wouldn’t drift apart from me. I’m secure in our friendship and know she’ll be around in decades to come. I don’t say that about every friend frankly because I know that isn’t realistic for a lot of people.
I hit the jack-pot with friends. I am always myself around her. I can be over the top goofy, talkative, introspective, blunt, anything. We have seen each other in times of almost any: mourning, sorrow, rejoicing, and laughter. Not only is she fun, kind, outgoing and joyful to everyone, as a friend she is loyal. She doesn’t see a mistake and write anyone off. She is a challenger and as a friend she expects you to meet your potential, to do great things. She knows life is hard and through struggles she won’t stand by and say “yea, I’ll stay here and let you mourn in your sorrows.” She also isn’t a pushover and doesn’t conform into what people may want her to be. She thinks ahead and has the attitude of, “this is hard. I know it’s hard. But in this will be a change and it is up to you to make a positive change.” That speaks to her optimism. She is deep. She doesn’t get to know someone and keep it on surface level, which is a main reason we are so close. I am anything but surface level. Small chat drives me nuts. She has trusted me with telling me where her heart is in different areas of life and I am so honored. I am so thankful I have her as a friend for life and am immensely blessed to have her as a roommate. I moved into this house not thinking I needed another best friend, but God knew I would need her and I am forever grateful.